Just waiting...

I have never felt more like a mother than I did today. I got one text, just one and this is what it said,

"some of the kids were coming from school and had a car accident. they are at JFK." (text from Baccus Roberts, mooreHOPE's representative in Liberia)

I received this text at 12:32pm. I immediately tweeted what had happened asking for prayer, texted all my prayer warriors and in between all that time, texted Baccus back 4 times to figure out some news. I waited, every minute feeling like a year. Every time my phone went off I jumped up waiting for it to be good news, nothing. It wasn't bad news, but at the same time..it was no news at all. 

I prayed that my kids were okay. I prayed that the driver was okay. I prayed for the hospital. I prayed for the doctors. I prayed especially for Mother Blessing and Uncle Theo (both caretakers of the orphanage home). 

I waited and waited. I finally realized how my mother felt when I was 2,000 miles away, in the hospital with malaria. Completely uncertain if her child would be okay. Now here I am, completely uncertain of what the next few days will hold for them but knowing one thing that is certain, God is holding there futures in His hands. 

As I waited for this news I realized that this situation is so much like our own lives. We wait and wait for God to answer our prayers, waiting for what we hope to be good news. As we wait, the devil plants bad thoughts in our head. "God isn't going to answer this prayer," & "If He does answer this prayer it isn't going to be what you wanted." 

I was sitting here, the devil taking over my mind. Telling me one of my kids isn't going to make it and they are all in critical condition and that there is NOTHING I CAN DO.

For a few minutes I was completely discouraged and then I remembered:

Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. (Hebrews 11:1 NIV)

I have faith. I have faith that I believe in the things I do not see. I have faith in a God who can protect those that I have no control over. I know that my God protects His children and He will protect them today.

At 4:23pm I got this text message, 

"there were eight of them in the accident. Boakai and Josephine were the most critical. all of em were discharged from JFK hospital. thank God!" (from Baccus Roberts)

I was relieved, much like a mother who found out her daughter was released from the hospital after fighting a deathly disease, twice.

I now have a new respect for parents, especially my own. 

You can be 2,000 miles away or 2 feet away, but some situations you just have absolutely no control over. You only have control over your faith. I have learned that God may not answer right away, but when He does it will be far greater than what you ever thought. 

I survived malaria, twice.

2,000 miles away from home and I had malaria. I didn't have the luxury of my parents getting what I needed in just a few short minutes or me running a hot bath to make me feel a little better. Nope, I didn't have any of those things. Not one. 

Then I realized, when people get malaria in Africa they don't think about where their parents are or if they can take a bucket bath, they are only thinking about how they are going to survive. How they are going to get treatment, if they get it at all. My hospital bill was $100. I stayed for two nights and three days. The hospital was nothing but a bed and a tiny bathroom. I am so grateful there were American nurses who kindly took care of me and made me an American dish!

I started thinking about how I got VIP treatment in the hospital because I had money. What about the people who didn't have money? What about the parents who couldn't afford to take there kids to the hospital for treatment? Do they have to just wait and watch their babies die?

It was my second week in Liberia and a little girl named Ma-V, who stayed at the orphanage home, was taken to the hospital. She, at only one years old, had malaria. She wasn't sleeping, she wasn't eating and she had a temperature of at least 103. I immediately rushed to the hospital knowing Mother Blessing didn't have the money for treatment. I had to beg the guards to let me in since it was passed visiting hours. As I walked in, Ma-V was just laying there, lifeless. She was always so lively and to see her like this was traumatizing for me. (Remember this is before I had malaria myself) I gave the doctor the money they needed to treat her and she has been well ever since! Praise God. 

Ma-V

At the orphanage home the kids would come up to me saying they had headaches and that it was because of the mosquitos (malaria). I just assumed it was a headache and gave them some Advil. I never thought anything of it.

Then I got malaria. Everything changed. The way I reacted to the kids when they didn't feel well almost instantly turned into mother instincts. I had felt the way they felt. Only, I had gotten treatment in a hospital. The best I could do for them at the time was send them to the little drug store to get some head ache medicine.

In 2010, malaria caused an estimated 655,000 deaths, mainly African children.

Since 2010 that number has increased. People are left to die in the streets trying to get to the hospitals. Parents are just waiting for their babies to stop crying. Kids are praying for their headaches to go away. But until people stand up and help fight this disease..they will still just be waiting, dying.

When I got back to the U.S. I got malaria all over again. I had a temperature of 104. Except this time I got 100% treated, it was gone. What a relief! For the people in Liberia and all over Africa they don't have that feeling.

I will be at risk for getting malaria every time I go but I'm not scared. I'm grateful to God for allowing me the opportunity to feel how these people feel every single day. I now understand what it feels like to have a disease that can kill you. This is a disease that is treatable and is very preventable!

Since being back I have decided I am going to be an LPN. I know what it's like to have a disease that has killed so many people and is still killing people today. As you have woke up with more healthiness than illness; 2,000 more people will die from malaria today.

I survived malaria, twice...those 2,000 people today can't say that.

My mosquito net.

The kids didn't want to leave me while I was sick.

Forcing down some juice and eggs in the hospital.

In the hospital. Completely exhausted but still smiling!